I never wanted to be a teacher…

“If you were not a teacher, what are you?” Many times, I just laughed off the question since I was always busy to think, so tired to answer and too lazy to explain. But since this pandemic had ironically given me so much time and chances to think things out, I realized that being a teacher was not my dream.

I can still vividly remember how proud I was to say, “When I grow up, I want to be a nurse” on my Kindergarten Recognition Day, just because I was fascinated by their spotless all-white uniform. I also dreamt of being an architect, because I would usually pass by a lot of beautiful houses while traveling to and from school. How funny it was, when I told my parents, I wanted to be an author, because my uncle sent us a huge box of books. I also had urge to shift from studying education to fine arts because I loved doing arts so much. And yes, I spent countless sleepless nights thinking of what ifs because being a teacher was not even on the list. But still, I became a teacher.

The first month was a struggle. The next few months were worse. The workloads were burdens I wanted off my shoulder. Then, there was this one moment that changed everything. That was when I was told to write a story, and I willingly complied. I was so ecstatic that I even illustrated it. Finally, after what I can say was a long time, I felt happy. I felt satisfied. I was also given a chance to attend seminars, an opportunity only given to few. I met great people that inspired me to do better at work. And during the pandemic, I was able to take part as an illustrator on the development of modules that were used for the blended learning. It was indeed, an added task, but it was fulfilling to be one of the teachers who were doing their very best to champion education amidst the global health crisis.

So, if I were not a teacher, I am a nobody. Because looking back over my life, I realized, I was living my dreams. I just got too caught up on my what ifs to recognize it sooner.